Marketing Is Like Dating...Stop Trying to Be Everyone’s Type

Marketing your business is like dating, you’re not meant to be everybody’s type.

It’s about showing up unfiltered, authentic, and rooted in self-love. Because when you speak from your Truth, your message flirts with the world and naturally magnetises the people who were always meant to find you.

Marketing, like dating both expose the same thing: how comfortable you are being seen without contorting yourself to be chosen.

Stop pretending

Too often, we market from fear, from comparison, or from what we think people want. We adjust our tone, our offer, even our personality, to appeal to everyone.

It’s exhausting.

It’s like showing up on a first date saying you love everything they love, and pretending to hate tea because they do.

You might get a nod of approval, but you’re not actually being you.

Marketing works the same way. When you try to appeal to everyone, you appeal to no one. And the more you suppress your quirks, your humour, your personality, your values, you’re basically watering down the very thing that makes you memorable.

Most people market from fear. Fear of being too much. Fear of being misunderstood. Fear of not fitting whatever is currently being rewarded by the algorithm gods.

So they adjust their tone. Their offers. Their personality. They start editing themselves before anyone has even had a chance to meet them.

Flirt with your audience

Flirting is fun. Flirting is confident. Flirting shows your unique energy without asking anyone to commit before they’re ready.

Marketing is the same. When you share your ideas, stories, offers, or even your “weird” opinions from a place of authenticity, you attract the people who resonate, and naturally repel those who don’t.

Take comfort in knowing that if your message, personality, or offer is authentic, not everyone will resonate with it. People who aren’t aligned, who don’t share your values, or who aren’t ready for your level of transformation will naturally disengage.

That repulsion isn’t a failure, mistake, or problem, it’s actually evidence that your message is clear and your marketing is honest.

The people who do stay, engage, or invest are the ones who are truly aligned with you and your work.

Your nervous system is part of the strategy

Marketing isn’t just about what you say. It’s about how safe your body feels being seen while you say it.

When you fear judgment, rejection, or begin to ask yourself “who do you think you are?”, that isn’t a mindset problem. It’s your body responding to the risk of being seen.

In dating, this shows up as overthinking what to say, shrinking yourself to be more palatable, or people-pleasing to avoid rejection.

In marketing, it’s the same response expressed through different behaviours:

Overthinking aka “Don’t make a mistake”

When the system doesn’t feel safe, it tries to reduce risk by increasing certainty.

This can look like:

• Over-explaining your work instead of letting it stand

• Endless tweaking of copy, offers, or visuals

• Getting one more credential before showing up

• Hiding behind frameworks, data, or jargon

• Consuming instead of creating (“research” as protection)

• Rewriting the same post instead of publishing

  
  

Nervous-system logic: If I get it perfect, I won’t be rejected.

Shrinking aka “Don’t be seen”

When something feels unsafe, your body tries to protect you by making you less noticeable.

This can look like:

• Using vague language instead of clear claims

• Downplaying results or saying “it’s just my opinion”

• Avoiding specificity so no one can disagree

• Posting inconsistently to avoid sustained visibility

• Keeping offers small even when demand is there

• Avoiding leadership language (“guide,” “expert,” “leader”)

  
  

Nervous-system logic: If I’m smaller, I’m safer.

People-pleasing aka “Don’t upset anyone”

When belonging feels at risk, the system prioritises approval over truth.

This can look like:

• Trying to speak to everyone instead of someone

• Softening boundaries around pricing, scope, or availability

• Mirroring your audience instead of leading them

• Avoiding polarising ideas even when they’re core to your work

• Over-delivering to compensate for self-doubt

• Constantly adjusting your message based on engagement

• Undercharging

  
  

Nervous-system logic: If everyone likes me, I’ll be safe.

Humour is magnetic

Laughing at yourself is a secret superpower. It’s an energy signal that says, I’m human, not performing.When you show up on a date as your wonderfully weird and unique self the walls drop instantly and that’s where connection happens.

In marketing, this kind of humour works the same way. It signals authenticity, confidence, and relatability. You’re not trying to look perfect; you’re showing you’re comfortable being real. And that builds trust.

everyone responds to energy before logic. If your marketing feels human and honest, and a little playful, it’s magnetic.

Marketing from alignment

Marketing from alignment means saying yes to resonance and no to dilution. It’s depth over reach, authenticity over likes, quality over quantity.

Marketing isn’t about copying what worked for someone else. Algorithms change, trends expire, Truth doesn’t.

Aligned marketing is rooted in self-trust. It asks, What do I actually believe? What do I stand for? What am I willing to be misunderstood about? And then it communicates from there.

When you market from alignment, you stop chasing attention and start building resonance. You stop trying to convince and start inviting. And that’s the paradox… the less you try to make your message land, the more it does, because people can feel when something is real.

Let yourself be seen

Marketing is a lot like dating: it asks you to be visible, imperfect, and willing to be misunderstood. It’s also an opportunity to show up fully as yourself.

When you stop trying to appeal to everyone and start speaking from your Truth, the right people don’t just notice you, they feel seen. They resonate, they invest, they commit, not because you manipulated them, but because your energy said, “this is me,” and it gave them permission to be themselves too.

And that’s when marketing stops being transactional and becomes a love story, between you and the people who were always meant to find you.